He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
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There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
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. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.