What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......