my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
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