yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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