just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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