never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
