Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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