dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
