Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Randomize
