well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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