How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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