if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
