Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo http://tfl.nu/oxyw
  Replies (8) Good night (1097) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car? http://tfl.nu/kx3d
  Replies (10) Good night (3091) Bad night (553)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): you were trying to give my penis an indian burn. http://tfl.nu/5vh0
  Replies (36) Good night (756) Bad night (8530)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final http://tfl.nu/shle
  Replies (34) Good night (938) Bad night (5468)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  USA! USA! USA!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic (414): USA! USA! USA! http://tfl.nu/meud
  Replies (34) Good night (4743) Bad night (841)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker

  (914): View more from New York

  Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker (914): Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high. http://tfl.nu/0o33
  Replies (7) Good night (3815) Bad night (955)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both http://tfl.nu/fi30
  Replies (13) Good night (4231) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for. http://tfl.nu/9lin
  Replies (4) Good night (1761) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof. http://tfl.nu/nzip
  Replies (5) Good night (1224) Bad night (395)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass http://tfl.nu/kbek
  Replies (9) Good night (1029) Bad night (458)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink. http://tfl.nu/i804
  Replies (1) Good night (354) Bad night (1083)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea. http://tfl.nu/vb43
  Replies (7) Good night (995) Bad night (566)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness http://tfl.nu/k0cp
  Replies (1) Good night (491) Bad night (232)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Pencil dick carries the name proudly.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): Pencil dick carries the name proudly. http://tfl.nu/iir6
  Replies (5) Good night (179) Bad night (494)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts. http://tfl.nu/nvqi
  Replies (3) Good night (317) Bad night (633)

Randomize