You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
