none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks