please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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