i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
My feet surprised me
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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