do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
