I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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