Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize