Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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