i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
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