New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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