i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
