theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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