There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize