ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
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