your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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