Whoa Z and x make the same sound
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
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this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
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you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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