I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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