you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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