I wannas sexs uuuuu
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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