My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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