Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
