Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
