i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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