ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize