I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
ttyl tear gas
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Terrible idea I love it
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
