No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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