Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize