There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
