fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
