rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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