Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
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