all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize