pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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