i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
