I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
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i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
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DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.