he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.