Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize