I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
