hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
