either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
smell my finger.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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