is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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