Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
